


dancing to this song all of our lives

by eunhathighs (gahye0nie)



Category: (여자)아이들 | (G)I-DLE
Genre: Cunnilingus, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, F/F, First Time, Making Out, Porn with Feelings, Semi-Public Sex, Unrequited Love, shuhua is lovesick and Gay Yearning and so is soyeon, there's not a lot of porn but it's there
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-02-16
Updated: 2021-02-16
Packaged: 2021-03-19 01:53:49
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,206
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29499870
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/gahye0nie/pseuds/eunhathighs
Summary: maybe the person who wanted her was there the whole time, waiting.
Relationships: Jeon Soyeon/Yeh Shuhua, unrequited Seo Soojin/Yeh Shuhua
Comments: 10
Kudos: 56





	dancing to this song all of our lives

**Author's Note:**

> what started out as a late-night smut concept became so much more and took me on an emotional ride...i never thought of soyeon and shuhua before but once i started thinking abt them suddenly everything makes sense and i needed to write this. prepare ur heart bc it's a doozy folks
> 
> title comes from in your eyes by jessie ware (a BOP btw check it out)
> 
> https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=msg38cxXqWQ
> 
> make sure to kudos/comment :)

The rough carpet on the floor of Recording Studio 5 is digging into Shuhua’s knees. At least, that’s what she believes the number is. She tries to remember. The other members never end up calling it by its number anyway, they always just call it “Soyeon’s studio.”

Soyeon.

Shuhua’s mind is drawn away from the impending rug burn she’s going to get on her bare legs, as uncomfortable as it is, to a more pleasant feel of soft skin under her palms. Her eyes flick up and are met with a gaze that shoots through her body. It makes Shuhua tremble under its weight, and the rug under her knees scratches against her skin. Shuhua shoots her eyes away. 

But the coldness of that stare isn’t on purpose, as Shuhua finds when a soft, breathy chuckle reaches her ears. Suddenly, Shuhua feels _very_ warm. Like the song she was supposed to be recording, the warmth melts away the snow. 

And as Shuhua’s mind races, she wonders all throughout how _this_ managed to happen. 

* * *

Shuhua had walked into the studio expecting a short visit. It was late, and she assumed she was going to get in, record a few takes, and retreat to a nice, warm bed, assuming the dogs wouldn’t interrupt her sleep. Soyeon was hunched over her desk in front of her laptop, hood up, turned away from her in a way that amused Shuhua. When Soyeon swiveled her chair in Shuhua’s direction, Shuhua could see several inches of space between the sides of the hood and Soyeon’s dusky gray-haired head. The hoodie looked so big it looked like it was about to swallow her up. Soyeon’s small stature was juxtaposed by her icy eyes looking in Shuhua’s direction. She must’ve been shooting something else that day, because her makeup was laid heavy, the whites of her eyes almost glowing against her sharp eyeliner.

“Hi, Shu.”

And just like that, the facade is gone. Soyeon’s voice is barely above a whisper, and it’s gentle to the point of Shuhua not remembering who the rapper of this group was.

“Why are you still awake?” Shuhua asks with a small laugh.

“Well, this song isn’t going to mix itself,” Soyeon jokes. It makes Shuhua smile.

Shuhua pulls up a chair next to her leader, Soyeon shuffling through her lyrics and notes.

“This part,” Soyeon says, gesturing to a highlighted line, Shuhua’s spoken part before the chorus. “It needs to be soft, yet powerful. It’s the killing part of the whole song. Like this.”

Soyeon repeats the “light a fire” line of HWAA, and Shuhua’s eyes widen in surprise at how the other woman saying it manages to intimidate her. It’s exactly how Shuhua imagined it should sound, the kind of impact it would create when the instrumental drops out and the refrain of the song hits straight after.

“You want _me_ to do this part?” Shuhua asks, her hands perched between her legs, clutching the edge of the seat.

“Well you said you wanted it before, didn’t you?” Soyeon comments, eyebrows pursed. 

“No I mean...are you _sure_?” Shuhua slightly muddles her words.

Soyeon shakes her head in disbelief. “Oh Shu, you can do this. Don’t be silly. It’s made for you.”

“If you say so…”

“You think I’m joking?” Soyeon says, “I thought about this song with _you_ in mind.”

Shuhua’s face flushes. “Huh?”

Soyeon doesn’t say anything for a moment, eyes wide. “I-it’s a continuation of Hann, so...it’s like a sequel to the story I was telling in that song. A sort of song about coldness and a pure beauty...so it’s good for winter, isn’t it? I think it suits you.”

“I see,” Shuhua replies, nodding, still feeling a little heat under her ears. 

Soyeon clears her throat and throws back her hood, shaking her head to loosen her hair, tostling over her shoulder. She flicks a pen between her fingers, studying the piece of paper in front of her.

Shuhua takes one of the lyrics sheets and scans her eyes over her line. She mumbles it to herself a couple times, then says it out loud, not to anyone in particular. Soyeon’s eyebrows raise.

“Oh, that’s perfect! Like that.”

“Ah! Ok!” Shuhua says, bouncing in her chair. 

Soyeon smiles wide, her teeth almost sparkling from the bright studio lighting. "See? It's natural to you."

Shuhua notices her phone buzz and her heart leaps, hurriedly fishing it from her pocket. Her body relaxes after she sees who the notification is from. Just Miyeon telling her she fed the puppies. Shuhua puts her phone back into her pocket, and it seems that her disappointment was too obvious to hide from Soyeon.

"What was that?"

"Ah, nothing, nothing…"

Soyeon's expression turns neutral. "Were you expecting something from Soojin?"

Shuhua flushes pink. She's been caught red-handed. "Mmm. She just hasn't messaged me all day."

"You guys live together, though?" Soyeon says in confusion, "Why would she need to?"

"I mean she doesn't _need_ to….but…"

Shuhua licks her lips. It almost feels embarrassing at this point. For longer than Shuhua can remember everything Soojin does makes her heart race, and the two were always close, but...Shuhua had always imagined they might be _closer_. 

"I thought maybe she'd send me a text wishing me luck, or…maybe she'd say…"

Soyeon waits for Shuhua to finish, but Shuhua doesn’t manage to finish her sentence. “Maybe she’s just doing something else right now? Come on, let’s get back to work.”

Shuhua nods. Soyeon’s right. It’s no big deal.

Soyeon is talking to her, giving her pointers on how she’d like her to sing her lines. Every time Soyeon sings, it feels like it’s the first time she’s ever heard it. Her tone when she raps is familiar. It’s low, taunting, like she’s hot and she knows it. Soyeon’s a cool person. But when Soyeon sings like this, guiding her, overpronouncing certain tones to help Shuhua understand exactly what kind of mood she wants in her music, it’s very vulnerable, less confident, relaxed. Even though she doesn’t feel the need for formal language, even around someone older, there’s still a part of Shuhua that feels like she needs to keep her guard up around Soyeon, that she shouldn’t relax too much. But the barrier comes down when Soyeon shows she wants to help.

It’s nice. Soyeon’s a cool person.

The rapper’s about to tell Shuhua something else, but then she stops herself. She goes into her files and pulls up recordings from the other members. She scrubs through each of the ones she’s recorded so far, and Shuhua’s ears perk up when she starts playing Soojin’s. Soyeon hasn’t mixed the vocals, so there’s a rawness and she can hear clearly when Soojin breathes into the mic. It’s so pretty, so delicate, and even then hearing her voice makes Shuhua want Soojin to hold her tightly until she breaks. She wants all of her, she wants to love her so much that she can’t stand it. She wants _Soojin_ to love her like this, like they do in movies. Her fantasies wrap her up in such a frenzy that it makes her just want it more and more. 

Shuhua’s hand is on the phone in her pocket. She wants it to buzz, but it doesn’t. 

It hurts. It seems so silly to get hurt from this, though. They’re friends. They don’t need to message each other every moment of the day, but…

“Shuhua?”

Shuhua looks up and sees Soyeon, her head cocked in confusion. “You still there?”

“Yeah! It’s nothing, nothing!”

Shuhua feels like she raised her voice a little too loudly, because Soyeon’s smile slips away. She sighs.

"Shuhua…" Soyeon's voice is gentle, genuine. "I...Do you…"

Shuhua looks up from the desk, and Soyeon's eyes are softer than she's ever seen them before. It only makes the dread fill her stomach more because she feels like Soyeon is going to ask her something she doesn't want to hear.

"Do you really _love_ Soojin?"

Shuhua huffs, shuffling the papers together with more force than they needed, but she feels utterly humiliated. "I dunno!"

Soyeon places her hands on Shuhua's. "Shu…"

_"It's not like she's going to like me back anyway!"_

Soyeon draws her hands into her lap slowly, watching Shuhua regain her thoughts, her anger turning to sadness. Big tears well up in Shuhua's eyes, clouding her sight, and she crosses her arms protectively across her chest.

"Idols can't even date _guys_ without people making a big deal out of it...nobody would risk it to date a girl...especially not _me_."

Shuhua jumps when Soyeon's hands slap onto her shoulders, forcing her to face the other woman.

"Don't say that."

Shuhua blinks past her tears. "Wh-whuh?"

The hands move up the sides of Shuhua's throat, then cupping her cheeks. Soyeon's breathing is heavy, her lips and teeth parted. She starts shaking her head before she even starts speaking.

"Don't ever _fucking_ say that…"

Soyeon looks like she’s about to cry, and Shuhua doesn’t even remember the last time she saw her cry. 

Shuhua takes notice of the hands cupping her cheeks, then Soyeon, then the physical closeness. She only looks away from the other for a second and catches the highlighted text of her line out of the corner of her eye.

And then suddenly, the slot machine inside her head hits the jackpot. 

_Ding ding ding._

She feels an indescribable force take control of her body, and kisses Soyeon. She kisses her pretty hard, but Soyeon returns the intensity and her hands squeeze tighter around her face. There’s a little squeak sound when their mouths meet, from both of them, and Shuhua can feel Soyeon shake. Her stomach turns in knots, and what feels like a block of ice in her belly keeps telling her _this isn’t Soojin_ , but she keeps _going._

Soyeon’s a cool person...who’s a really good kisser. Shuhua’s never kissed someone like this before, but Soyeon _definitely_ has. They tilt their heads and in the movement, Soyeon’s tongue parts Shuhua’s lips. Shuhua reflexively pulls away and takes a breath. 

“I’m sorry,” Soyeon breathes out the moment their lips part. 

“Huh?” Shuhua looks at Soyeon’s face. She’s already red. 

“I-I got carried away, didn’t I?”

“No!”

Shuhua pulls Soyeon back in, and Soyeon makes a small noise of surprise, a murmur of a moan when Shuhua tries sticking her tongue in Soyeon’s mouth, her whole tongue. Soyeon laughs into Shuhua’s mouth. 

“Mm, you’re...not doing it right…a little less…”

Shuhua hops up onto Soyeon’s lap, the other chair rolling away from the table. Soyeon’s hands leave her face and hold onto either side of Shuhua’s hips, and her body tingles. She kisses her again, taking it easy on the tongue this time, and Soyeon responds with a positive-sounding moan, softly echoing her movements. Shuhua’s neck hurts a little; she has a bit of height on Soyeon so it’s a little awkward for the both of them to kiss like this. But it’s hard to resist the fingers pushing up her shirt, pressing on skin. Shuhua starts getting goosebumps when Soyeon’s long, pointed nails graze against her back. 

_Oh wow._

Soyeon’s hands move further up, her baggy green t-shirt bunching up right above her bra strap. She shivers when she feels a thumb against the buckle, and Soyeon reacts in turn.

“I...tell me if it’s too much…” Soyeon whispers. She looks off at the door, then back into Shuhua’s eyes.

“My neck hurts,” Shuhua admits, and Soyeon softly chuckles. Shuhua furrows her brows, then gets an idea. She dismounts off Soyeon’s lap, getting on her knees at Soyeon’s feet. She sits up taller so her head is closer to level with Soyeon’s.

“Better?”

Soyeon nods, and kisses her again. Shuhua really likes that. Soyeon’s legs part to let Shuhua sit comfortably in between, pulling her in closer, hands gently wrapped around her head. Everything feels warm, the embrace, her kisses, her thighs…

_Oh wow._

Soyeon’s thighs are muscular, yet soft, and Shuhua has suddenly found a new obsession. She squeezes every so often, and once the squeezing becomes rubbing, up and down, underneath…

“Oh, _fuck_ me…” Soyeon gasps. It’s brief, quiet, but Shuhua notices it right away. She stops and stares up at Soyeon.

“You want to…?” Shuhua trails off, the word she wants to repeat not budging from her lips.

Soyeon turns red again, redder than she already was. “I mean, we don’t have to…”

Shuhua notices a pattern. Soyeon makes a move, boldly, then backtracks. It must be a leader’s instinct. She wants to protect Shuhua from something, but Shuhua makes it clear she doesn’t need protecting from this.

From _her._

“I want to. I’ve never done this before…”

“I haven’t either…” Soyeon admits.

Shuhua nods in acknowledgement, then her fingers trail off, hooking over the waistband of Soyeon’s pants. Soyeon whispers a “please” and Shuhua slowly removes them. Shuhua’s pulse races as more and more skin is revealed, and the thighs she was touching look even better. And of course, what’s in between them. The scent is what draws her in first, heady arousal that makes Shuhua stop breathing. Soyeon is so wet; she’s clenching and unclenching. She’s sure to leave a stain on the chair, but she doesn’t seem to care. Shuhua’s mouth is slack, and she looks up at Soyeon, unsure of what to do. Whatever she was about to do, she didn’t feel like she was going to do a good job. It was hard to even fathom her, of all people, pleasuring someone. 

She shifts her position. The rug is scraping against her knees. Recording Studio 5, right? 

And now she’s thinking how she got herself in this position.

How Soyeon wanted _her,_ and now she wanted Soyeon back. She wonders how long Soyeon might’ve felt this way. Soyeon wrote Hann with her in mind. Was it ever since then? She starts recalling a couple years back now, but she can’t remember Soyeon much at all. It’s all Soojin, her flashy red hair, her lips, her voice, Shuhua running up to her at every possible moment just to hug her, kiss her. Even when Soojin told her to stop being so annoying, it was always playful, maybe even a little flirtatious.

Or, was it?

Shuhua can’t help but feel like an absolute idiot. All this time, she was chasing after Soojin, every moment of her day consumed by thoughts of her...when maybe the person who wanted her like she wanted Soojin was there the whole time, waiting. 

Goosebumps trickle up Shuhua’s arms, and fingernails brush against her scalp. Her head is turned upwards, and she makes eye contact with Soyeon. Soyeon’s removed her hoodie now, only in a black bra, and the sight makes Shuhua’s breath hitch.

“Are you nervous? Is that why you’re keeping me waiting?”

Shuhua nods dumbly. It doesn’t help that Soyeon’s voice when she’s turned on is making the hairs on the back of Shuhua’s neck stand up. She knows Soyeon is trying to lighten the mood with a joke but it really sounds so sensual right now. 

“H-How do you want me to do it?”

Soyeon reaches between her legs and two fingers part her lips. Shuhua’s mind fills with a myriad of curses and oh god’s, and prayers to whatever gods might exist. Soyeon is so _beautiful._

Another hand wraps around Shuhua’s head. “Can you...use your mouth? And your tongue?”

“You mean you want me to lick your um…” Shuhua’s words get muddled again, but Soyeon seems to understand what she means, and nods. 

Shuhua gulps, and takes one more cursory glance in Soyeon’s eyes before she opens her mouth, tongue flat between her pussy lips. Shuhua hears a shuddering gasp once her mouth makes contact, and starts broadly licking. It tastes slightly sour, but not unpleasantly so. Soyeon is moving against her tongue, working a rhythm. She softly moans, and it lets Shuhua know she’s doing a good job.

Or at least she’s doing _something_.

Shuhua’s touched herself before, no thanks to sleepless nights and thoughts of someone she can’t recall the name of right now. There’s a little bit of weight off her shoulders knowing that she’s working with the same equipment, but it’s so different doing it to someone else. It’s nice having this power, every lap and stroke hearing gasps, moans, and even _whimpers_. That’s certainly a sound she hasn’t heard from Soyeon before. 

But Shuhua isn’t complaining. She wants to hear it more. Her tongue rolls over Soyeon’s clit, and she gets more high-pitched, breathy whines for her troubles.

“Right there, baby…there…”

Shuhua won’t say no to that. Heat licks the tips of her ears when Soyeon calls her “baby” like that. She wants to hear it more. She wants to hear every single sound Soyeon makes when her lips brush against her, suck on her clit, dip in between pink and flushed red lips.

She wants more of _Soyeon._

Shuhua’s eyes look up from her work, and she drinks it all in. Soyeon is looking down at her, eyebrows pursed in the middle of her forehead, lips open, mouthing Shuhua’s name but the only sounds escaping are moans. One of Soyeon’s hands is groping her own breast over her bra, and when she pinches her nipple her chest arches forward. She looks so pretty, delicate...like she’s about to fall apart. Soyeon’s thighs press against Shuhua’s ears, but she can hear Soyeon, albeit muffled. 

“K-keep going...I’m gonna come…gonna come…”

Soyeon’s hand on the back of her head is pushing her into her, closer, and Shuhua keeps flicking her tongue against the underside of Soyeon’s clit. 

“A...a...aa…Sh-Shu…”

Soyeon’s stuttered gasps dissolve into long, low moans, and Shuhua is overwhelmed with wetness in her mouth, tugging at her hair, and trembling thighs around her head. It feels like a fire, surrounding her, inside her. Everything is warm and everything is Soyeon. 

Shuhua pulls back, and the first thing she notices is that there’s wetness dripping down her chin. She licks her lips, trying to get her chin, but she can’t quite reach. She probably looks like an absolute mess, but when she looks up Soyeon is just smiling. Soyeon swipes her thumb across Shuhua’s chin and gets any residual off.

Soyeon is so beautiful. She’s cool, but she’s also so, so gentle and kind. 

“Are you okay?” Shuhua asks. She considers it might be a stupid question, but Soyeon probably doesn’t think it is.

“Yes…” Soyeon says breathlessly. “Shuhua…”

Shuhua cocks her head. “Hm?”

“We…”

Shuhua finishes her sentence. “...should be r-recording...shouldn’t we.”

“No.”

Soyeon cradles Shuhua’s head in her hands, and Shuhua blinks in confusion.

She leans forward and kisses Shuhua’s forehead. “We...can postpone recording till tomorrow.” 

Shuhua leans in and kisses Soyeon again. Her lips are near numb from all of the kissing they’ve been doing, but she can’t get enough. She loves it.

And she thinks she loves Soyeon.

Maybe?

Soyeon’s hand travels back behind Shuhua’s head, and fingers thread through her hair. She laughs into her mouth.

Oh, yeah. She loves Soyeon.


End file.
